Permanent Change – Be A Better Lover Forever

So I give out a lot of advice; here in my blog, in my newsletter and in Ejaculation Guru.

But I wonder just how much of it is actually used.

Sure I hear success stories from people, but not from every person who gets my advice.

There is so much great advice to be had about lasting longer in bed, giving women incredible pleasure and being an all round greater lover.

But why do so few people go out and master the art?

I think there’s a lot of reasons, mostly based around the fact that we as humans are creatures of habit and we have a lot of psychological “things” that encourage us to stick to doing what we’ve always done.

Take a look around.

How many people do you know that haven’t really changed how they are or what they do in the last 5, 10, 20 years?

People transforming and completely changing happens so rarely.

This is because there are a lot of things going on in our head trying to keep us the way we are.

It’s intuitive to keep doing what we’ve always done.

But doing what we’ve always done also means getting the same result we’ve always gotten.

So if you do the same thing you’ve always done in bed you’ll always get the same result.

This means that if most of the time you last less than a minute, you’ll keep on lasting less than a minute if you don’t change.

If you fail to give your partner incredible orgasms, you’ll keep failing to give your partner incredible orgasms if you don’t change.

So if you want to improve your sex life you’re going to have to make a change in what you do.

And in order to make a real change you need to overcome those “in built” forces that try to get you to keep doing what you’ve always done.

And luckily there are ways of making a permanent change.

There are ways to consciously break the forces that try and keep us the same as we’ve always been.

It’s just that few people actually DO the steps needed to make permanent change.

So if you want to make a permanent change like lasting longer in bed or giving your partner more orgasms then you’ve got to follow the steps…

Steps to making a permanent change

Firstly you’ve got to realize that permanent change is possible.

I know I’ve just spoken all about how most people never change.

And this is true.

But there are also many examples of people who have changed.

Look around to find examples.

Like people who grew up in the toughest of circumstances and went on to become millionaires(e.g. Alan Sugar who started in a council flat in London and went on to be worth US$1.16 billion, read more here)

Or people who despite having no arms and legs have gone on to live fulfilling lives (watch video here).

Or people who have gone from being hugely overweight to normal weight again and stayed that way (e.g. David Smith who went from 650 pounds to 240 pounds, video here)

So change is possible.

Your personal change strategy

Now try looking back in your own life.

When in your own life have you made a permanent change?

(It can be hard to remember because you are how you are now, but think back to a time when you wanted something and did it)

Maybe it’s a skill you learned that you didn’t have before, like driving a car or something you learned at work.

Even if it’s something really small you still did it.

You still made a change in your life.

And there’s a lot to be learned from this.

So take a second now to learn from this…

Write down what you did differently to what you do normally when you made this particular change?

Were you working with someone on the change?

Were you especially motivated because you felt you’d get something truly amazing from it?

Were you working towards a deadline?

Did you have some kind of habit of working on it periodically?

Was your progress or outcome being measured in some way, like with a certificate, exam or qualification?

Or was there something else that was different to what you usually do when you go about doing something new?

Do this now, write down your answers. It’ll only take a half a minute.

When you actually write down your answers you’ll be surprised at what you might find.

So with your answers to those questions you’ve got a strategy that works for you in making a permanent change.

I don’t even really have to say much more, all you’ve got to do to make a permanent change is apply what has worked for you in the past to making the new change you desire, like lasting longer in bed for example.

But read on to learn what else you can do to guarantee your change lasts.

More change strategies

In the above questions I alluded to a few powerful strategies for permanent change.

Let me formalize them here for you.

Apply these strategies all together for maximum effect and result

  • Have a measurable outcome or goal that you can know for sure when it’s achieved (often the use of some kind of numbers helps). Examples may include
    • Lasting over 30 minutes in bed
    • Giving woman 3 orgasms in one love making “session”
  • Get an “accountability partner” or a team mate
    • If you’re comfortable with this, find a friend who you’ll share your progress with or that will hold you accountable for any training you have to do
    • Or just tell people about your plans to build your commitment to them. E-mail me if you like so you feel more committed and will feel more ashamed if you back down on your commitment to change (use negative motivation to your advantage)
  • Set a deadline to your goal
    • Set a specific time frame in which you want to have your goal by
    • With a specific deadline you force yourself to plan and schedule actions
  • Commit to habitual training
    • If getting your goal means doing something on a daily basis, like training your PC muscle, then schedule it for a set time of every day. For optimal success schedule first thing in the morning.
  • Measure your progress
    • Measure your progress towards your goal. This can be very motivating when you look back and realize how far you’ve come and will keep you committed to the change.
    • This can be as simple as having a box you tick everyday if you’ve done your training.
  • Motivate yourself consciously every day
    • There’ll be days when you wake up less motivated than others. Don’t let how you wake up determine if you’ll follow through on your change. Start the habit of spending 10 minutes at the start of day reminding yourself of why you want what you want and feeling how great it is to have the goal or change you’re aiming for.

So there are some very powerful strategies for creating change that lasts.

Now you need to start applying them.

Without applying them they are useless.

And if you want to see some seriously fast change then apply all the above steps together including your personal change strategy.

The final strategy

Above are strategies for staying super motivated and being sure to follow through on a change you want.

Now you need to know exactly what to do to reach your goal.

You need the steps that get you from where you are now to your desired goal, like going from lasting less than 1 minute to over 30 minutes.

As an experiment why not start with applying the above change strategies to my last blog post on how to stop premature ejaculation.

Now you’ve got the strategies for change and the roadmap of how to get to where you want.

Just add this final strategy that I’ve been saving for you…

Start now.

Start this very second as soon as you finish reading this.

Don’t wait, don’t say to yourself you’ll do it later, don’t procrastinate and don’t rationalize your way out of getting started now.

Start now while you’re motivated so you build the commitment to keep going.

If you don’t start now you may never start and you’ll never get the change you want.

Good luck.

And let me know what you thought of this blog post and / or how you get on in the comments below.

I’ll also be happy to answer any questions you may have.